The respective devil and angel that sit perched on the left and right shoulder are not making it easy for me to wrap up the picks for week 11 in the NFL. On one shoulder, you have the devil, who looks strangely like Bill Belichick.
On the other shoulder, the angel, whose appearance is loosely based on a bearded Todd Haley. On the devil side, lil Bill is saying “We’re the Patriots, we’re at Foxboro, we’re legends, we don’t lose, we have a crazy black man who changed his name to a spanish number.” On the other side, the angelic bearded wonder says softly, “We’re lying in wait, we have played through tough situations, Tyler Palko is the second coming of Jesus, LOOK AT THE BEARD, LOOK AT THE BEARD!”
Then there is the issue of not picking a score for this weeks games in my winning predictions. This has proven not to be the best idea. I’m a mere 6 for 13 for week 11 going into tonight, so it doesn’t matter what I do, I’m still mediocre at best. Plus it’s no fun just picking winners. So with that, a little prediction as I wake from the torn brain nightmare.
Matt Cassel is out for the season. It was just a couple of seasons ago when that funnel cake loving freak, Tom Brady, went down for the year and Cassel had to step in to fill his shoes. The Pats won 11 games that season and missed the playoffs. That was when the AFC was good. Now, Tyler Palko tries to do the same shoe filling, only with a different result, a playoff birth.
It won’t be easy with Brady and the powdered sugar ring around his greasy lips in the way.
It should be quite simple. The Chiefs bruised and battered, bloodied and beaten. They have lost arguably their 3 best players for most of the season (Jamal Charles, Eric Berry, and Cassel). The Pats should roll, right? Right?
Right. There is just too much as far as road blocks go for the Chiefs to have a chance tonight. Of course, anything can happen, but let’s be realistic here, the only thing that will make this game interesting is if Brady’s funnel cake loving ass goes down in the first series, and Ryan Mallett has to come in. Then we would at least keep with the backup quarterback theme for the week. In lue of that, we will have to settle for yet another crappy Monday night game. We need to pray to the angel on one shoulder that the NFL gets better matchups next season for MNF. The devil really just thinks that this is karma for ESPN (Bwahahahaha). Besides, we all know the devil talking in your ear is almost always more appealing. Especially if you’re getting scratched by Todd Haley’s beard.
Patroits 41 – Chiefs 13